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Thread: rules vs cultural mores

  1. #11
    Maggiemay's Avatar
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    Are you over analyzing Soul?

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    Hmmmm...I often wonder why any of us come here instead of our families or friends for advice or to be comforted!

    I think many of us are trying to get through life without too much judgement and its easier to do it in text and print on the other side of a computer than to face people we have the chance to see everyday with whatever issue we may have!

    Interestingly...I am finding that being here has opened me up to discuss many things I never ever would have with my sisters and girl friends and the one holy roller judgemental sister I thought would be horrified was actually dealing with most of the same issues! My being open here has lead to a better relationship with her and a few other friends. We dicuss shaving versus waxing and blow jobs and techniques and we talk about our bodies openly in ways we never did. No judgement, just women who needed someone to go first and make it okay to say all the weird, nasty, scary, not for public consumption ****e that goes through the majority of people's heads!
    If this makes sense to anyone, I continue to hang here, although with less frequency due to life, because it keeps me real with those I have discovered I can be real with daily and I am greatful to those online who have helped me!

    That said...I do not want to log on and be accosted with pm's asking me what my ****** smells, tastes like or have anyone be mean to me for no damn good reason! I have left another venue due to the overtly unwelcomed sexual nature and viscious attitudes of too many of its members.
    I will flirt my buttooski off at times and thats all it is...flirting!!! Its called the Flirting Shack and although more can happen between people, I have found the majority of people here to be married, perhaps unsatisfactorily, but married and not looking to get out of said marriage! Therefore romantic relationships are quite messy!
    Flirty, fun relationships left on here and perhaps yes even venues such as yahoo work best, but I learned to never go into a relationship with someone and expect anything long term other than friendship!
    I think if you want to "play" with someone then ask nicely and respectfully after a solid exchange of obvious flirting and ask privately and then take it somewhere else outside the threads!!

    Thats my perspective of the Flirting Shack and what it has done for me and I want it to remain the "safe" place it has always been for me!


  3. #13
    Enjoy darksoul66's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Maggiemay View Post
    Are you over analyzing Soul?
    That's always a possibility. Its also possible that there are some trouble-making dynamics going on in efforts to guard teritory or control others here. I'm just one of those people who's into fairness. While I can certainly do the hateful thing, its not my preference

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    Living a Film Noir Life Quiet Walker's Avatar
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    Rules???? There are rules??????? Why was I not informed of this?????? I was truly hoping that good taste and personal expression could go hand in hand, at least here. If someone has joined thinking this was some free for all, as Beauty has alluded to at that other site, then it would be in everybody's interest that they leave quietly. There is a plethora of sites available for people who are not interested in flirting or any other interaction that does not involve hand lotion and batteries. Those that have that as a goal would probably be better served at one of them.

    Yes, we are all adults, and quite a few of us are married, good and bad. And, I have heard at least, that there have been the odd couple that have actually hooked up and made that frightening transition from electronic to corporeal. That notwithstanding, not all of us are here to "play" or "hook up." I personally have made some incredible friends here, both male and female. And it is in that variety, that give and take that powers all relationships, that is where the true strength of this site lies. It is not so much how "hot" the posts or people are, it is not the number of notches on your cyber bedpost that matter, but the plain and simple interaction of people. To imply that any two people are here for the same thing is ludicrous. Each and every one of is here for a different reason. But no matter what the reason, or reasons we are here, we all deserve simple dignity and respect, in all communications. If anyone feels they have been slighted or defamed here, then my suggestion is to look to everyone else. See what they do, see how they post, watch the interactions. The mods and admins do a pretty good job of keeping things on a balanced field here, a thankless and usually misunderstood job to be sure. There is no harm ,no foul in being crass, or even pushy, there is however a price to pay.

    Now, got to get hold of Beauty and have a long talk. Hmmmmmm, waxing and shaving and tasting, sounds like a party I need to go to...............
    Difficult relationships can be our greatest teachers and healers. They can also accentuate all our weaknesses and frailties.

  5. #15
    I'm a Flirt
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    Quote Originally Posted by Caveman View Post
    As I stated, if you treat others with respect, typically you will be treated with respect. There are no real hard and fast rules outside of keeping any disputes out of the public threads.

    This place is like any other, some here for some purposes, some for others. Some are here only for fun, some doing some soul searching, some looking for something. Understanding that each person here is a real individual, with sometimes differing ideals, not bringing in per-conceived ideas, but allowing each to be themselves as they allow you the same freedom.

    This is a site which allows a great deal of freedom, however not all may be where you are. Perhaps you can learn from them as they may learn from you over time. You can develop good friends here, and I can tell you from personal experience, there are good friends to be had here ... Like any place, it takes time to build that level of trust. Many here have been hurt, or are hurting. Time and effort are required.


    Good luck.

    Well said!!!


    Quote Originally Posted by darksoul66 View Post
    That's always a possibility. Its also possible that there are some trouble-making dynamics going on in efforts to guard teritory or control others here. I'm just one of those people who's into fairness. While I can certainly do the hateful thing, its not my preference

    There is no doubt that many boards resemble dysfunctional families and I guess thatís putting it mildly. Having said that, I see none of that behavior occurring here (my opinion and I believe it to be true) and that makes this venue a rarity. Sure, thereís bound to be disagreements of one sort or another from time to time but I think itís safe to say that the majority of us here have seen and personally experienced much, much worse elsewhere.

    Anyways, thatís an unsolicited two centsí worth from someone who isnít able to spend as much time here as heíd like except for quick visits to the Daily Quiz where Iím getting my head handed to me by FireFly. LOL!

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