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Thread: Last Thing That Made You LOL...Vol 2

  1. #21
    BBS SpoiledBrat's Avatar
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  3. #22
    Flirt Jedi FlirtinIL's Avatar
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    Helping to start the weekend. - Causingtrouble An Ostrich burger for you ... Mmmm () - OopsDidIDoThat 

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    Bear with me....HAHA yes pun intended. If you didn't know anything about artificial sweetners...NOW you do!
    An Amazon review of Haribo Gummy Bear, Sugarfree

    "Amazon Verified Purchase
    Oh man...words cannot express what happened to me after eating these. The Gummi Bear "Cleanse". If you are someone that can tolerate the sugar substitute, enjoy. If you are like the dozens of people that tried my order, RUN!

    First of all, for taste I would rate these a 5. So good. Soft, true-to-taste fruit flavors like the sugar variety...I was a happy camper.

    BUT (or should I say BUTT), not long after eating about 20 of these all hell broke loose. I had a gastrointestinal experience like nothing I've ever imagined. Cramps, sweating, bloating beyond my worst nightmare. I've had food poisoning from some bad shellfish and that was almost like a skip in the park compared to what was going on inside me.

    Then came the, uh, flatulence. Heavens to Murgatroyd, the sounds, like trumpets calling the demons back to Hell...the stench, like 1,000 rotten corpses vomited. I couldn't stand to stay in one room for fear of succumbing to my own odors.

    But wait; there's more. What came out of me felt like someone tried to funnel Niagara Falls through a coffee straw. I swear my sphincters were screaming. It felt like my delicate starfish was a gaping maw projectile vomiting a torrential flood of toxic waste. 100% liquid. Flammable liquid. NAPALM. It was actually a bit humorous (for a nanosecond)as it was just beyond anything I could imagine possible.

    AND IT WENT ON FOR HOURS.

    I felt violated when it was over, which I think might have been sometime in the early morning of the next day. There was stuff coming out of me that I ate at my wedding in 2005.

    I had FIVE POUNDS of these innocent-looking delicious-tasting HELLBEARS so I told a friend about what happened to me, thinking it HAD to be some type of sensitivity I had to the sugar substitute, and in spite of my warnings and graphic descriptions, she decided to take her chances and take them off my hands.

    Silly woman. All of the same for her, and a phone call from her while on the toilet (because you kinda end up living in the bathroom for a spell) telling me she really wished she would have listened. I think she was crying.

    Her sister was skeptical and suspected that we were exaggerating. She took them to work, since there was still 99% of a 5 pound bag left. She works for a construction company, where there are builders, roofers, house painters, landscapers, etc. Lots of people who generally have limited access to toilets on a given day. I can't imagine where all of those poor men (and women) pooped that day. I keep envisioning men on roofs, crossing their legs and trying to decide if they can make it down the ladder, or if they should just jump.

    If you order these, best of luck to you. And please, don't post a video review during the aftershocks."
    Life is never all brutal or all beautiful.
    It's both, all the time.
    Life is Brutiful!

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  5. #23
    Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket FireFly's Avatar
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    Thanks for your help FF, you're a lil treasure ;) - junkmail Happy birthday () - Naughty Babe for what is about to happen with the upgrade - Causingtrouble for what is about to happen with the upgrade - Causingtrouble to help wake you up - Causingtrouble 
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  7. #24
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    Welcome and enjoy one on me. - Causingtrouble Hope you are enjoying yourself :) - FireFly 

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    This thread.

  8. #25
    Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket FireFly's Avatar
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    No Message - PrincessCharming Merry Christmas! - Divinity sharing my cake - Causingtrouble Sorry to read your heartbroken ($ - Naughty Babe Merry Christmas - Naughty Babe 
    Just for you. :) - SpoiledBrat Happy New Year's - Causingtrouble Happy Valentines Day - Naughty Babe Just cuz - Firecat Happy Mother's Day!!! - sexylily 
    Happy birthday - Naughty Babe For you on your birthday - Firecat Hope you had a wonderful birthday. - SpoiledBrat Relax ... just do it ... x - Songbird I remember when you quit. Congrats on your 5year milestone () - Naughty Babe 
    Thanks for your help FF, you're a lil treasure ;) - junkmail Happy birthday () - Naughty Babe for what is about to happen with the upgrade - Causingtrouble for what is about to happen with the upgrade - Causingtrouble to help wake you up - Causingtrouble 
    AIDS/HIV - DARE - DUI Awareness - Epidermolysis Bullosa - Heart Disease - Lymphoma - MADD - Substance Abuse - FireFly Cancer - Epilepsy - Foster Care - Gynecological Cancer - Rett Syndrome - FireFly 

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  10. #26
    Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket FireFly's Avatar
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    No Message - PrincessCharming Merry Christmas! - Divinity sharing my cake - Causingtrouble Sorry to read your heartbroken ($ - Naughty Babe Merry Christmas - Naughty Babe 
    Just for you. :) - SpoiledBrat Happy New Year's - Causingtrouble Happy Valentines Day - Naughty Babe Just cuz - Firecat Happy Mother's Day!!! - sexylily 
    Happy birthday - Naughty Babe For you on your birthday - Firecat Hope you had a wonderful birthday. - SpoiledBrat Relax ... just do it ... x - Songbird I remember when you quit. Congrats on your 5year milestone () - Naughty Babe 
    Thanks for your help FF, you're a lil treasure ;) - junkmail Happy birthday () - Naughty Babe for what is about to happen with the upgrade - Causingtrouble for what is about to happen with the upgrade - Causingtrouble to help wake you up - Causingtrouble 
    AIDS/HIV - DARE - DUI Awareness - Epidermolysis Bullosa - Heart Disease - Lymphoma - MADD - Substance Abuse - FireFly Cancer - Epilepsy - Foster Care - Gynecological Cancer - Rett Syndrome - FireFly 

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  11. #27
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    Welcome and enjoy one on me. - Causingtrouble Hope you are enjoying yourself :) - FireFly 

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    A comment Divinity made today :)

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  13. #28
    Purposely erratic Divinity's Avatar
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    I got you a drink :) - FireFly A flower to wear in your now longer hair x - Songbird something for a snack - Causingtrouble to help get you out of being cranky - Causingtrouble Something to share. - Monkey Butler 
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    Merry Christmas xx - FireFly 

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    An Old SNL skit -

    Jane Curtin: Well, the drive against pornography districts in major cities continued to gain momentum this week, as more demonstrations were held in New York. Bill Murray was on the scene at one of them in Manhatten, and has an eyewitness report. Bill?

    [ Bill becomes more and more aroused as he reads his report ]

    Bill Murray: Thank you, Jane. The Citizens' Committee to clean up New York's porn-infested areas continued its series of rallies today, as a huge, throbbing, pulsating crowd sprang erect from nowhere and forced its way into the steaming nether region surrounding the glistening, sweaty intersection of Eighth Avenue and Forty-Second Street. Thrusting, driving, pushing its way into the usually receptive neighborhood, the excited throng, now grown to five times its original size, rammed itself again and again and again into the quivering, perspiring, musty darkness, fluctuating between eager anticipation and trembling revulsion. Now, suddenly, the tumescent crowd and the irresistable area were one heaving, alternately melting and thawing turgid entity, ascending to heights heretofore unexperienced. Then, with a gigantic, soul-searching, heart-stopping series of eruptions, it was over. Afterwards, the crowd had a cigarette and went home. Jane?

    Jane Curtin: [ eyes Bill suspiciously ] Thank you, Bill. That was a very stimulating story.

    Bill Murray: [ uncomfortably ] I'll say!

  14. #29
    ~ The Perfect Storm ~ Naughty Babe's Avatar
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    how is this on lover? - Stickin Itin Happy Valentine's Day to you too :) - FireFly Hoping your day was filled with love. :) - SpoiledBrat Because you've always been someone I could depend on...and you understand me. - Firecat Because that's what you are ... you've got a treasure in (and on) your chest ;-) - Songbird 
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    Have a very Merry Christmas !!! - princesspink I loves ya! - Beauty Happy Birthday! - Antics1313 No Message - JerseyGirl Love the sarcastic ways - JerseyGirl 
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    Seeing a friend of mine being interviewed on the local news
    ~ Yield to temptation, it may

    not pass your way again ~

  15. #30
    Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket FireFly's Avatar
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    No Message - PrincessCharming Merry Christmas! - Divinity sharing my cake - Causingtrouble Sorry to read your heartbroken ($ - Naughty Babe Merry Christmas - Naughty Babe 
    Just for you. :) - SpoiledBrat Happy New Year's - Causingtrouble Happy Valentines Day - Naughty Babe Just cuz - Firecat Happy Mother's Day!!! - sexylily 
    Happy birthday - Naughty Babe For you on your birthday - Firecat Hope you had a wonderful birthday. - SpoiledBrat Relax ... just do it ... x - Songbird I remember when you quit. Congrats on your 5year milestone () - Naughty Babe 
    Thanks for your help FF, you're a lil treasure ;) - junkmail Happy birthday () - Naughty Babe for what is about to happen with the upgrade - Causingtrouble for what is about to happen with the upgrade - Causingtrouble to help wake you up - Causingtrouble 
    AIDS/HIV - DARE - DUI Awareness - Epidermolysis Bullosa - Heart Disease - Lymphoma - MADD - Substance Abuse - FireFly Cancer - Epilepsy - Foster Care - Gynecological Cancer - Rett Syndrome - FireFly 

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