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Thread: Girl, 13. Gets detention for hugging two friends

  1. #31
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    I agree, but the problem of all this over sheltering and making kids think they win no matter what, is they enter the real world with no sense of reality. I am not saying let kids do things that are harmful to themselves or others, but somethings they need to expierence, its part of life and growing up.
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    Quote Originally Posted by Stargazer View Post
    I agree, but the problem of all this over sheltering and making kids think they win no matter what, is they enter the real world with no sense of reality. I am not saying let kids do things that are harmful to themselves or others, but somethings they need to expierence, its part of life and growing up.
    Whoa Whoa Whoa there little doggie...You're saying that a proven theory (so its a fact now!...*wink) of bullying based on the immaturity and sometimes intellect level of a child is acceptable for another child to endure because that child needs to experience the violence that occurred to him when all he did was hug another boys girlfriend or even just the object of his affection! Its okay for a child to endure being called and labeled a homo or a lezzie because he/she hugged a same sex student?

    No of course you aren't and I understand, but this is the type of crap that occurs in school! Its real and happens all over this country and schools have to have a zero tolerance policy! Sometimes its just a misunderstanding...and has nothing to do with the over sheltering of our children in this society!


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  5. #33
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    Quote Originally Posted by Beauty View Post


    Whoa Whoa Whoa there little doggie...You're saying that a proven theory (so its a fact now!...*wink) of bullying based on the immaturity and sometimes intellect level of a child is acceptable for another child to endure because that child needs to experience the violence that occurred to him when all he did was hug another boys girlfriend or even just the object of his affection! Its okay for a child to endure being called and labeled a homo or a lezzie because he/she hugged a same sex student?

    No of course you aren't and I understand, but this is the type of crap that occurs in school! Its real and happens all over this country and schools have to have a zero tolerance policy! Sometimes its just a misunderstanding...and has nothing to do with the over sheltering of our children in this society!
    No its not acceptable and should be dealt with when it occurs. But what are we teaching children about this topic. It bad for someone to even hug you. So, and this has happened, a friend or relative hugs them as any would and they have been told that it is bad and now that person is charged with child molestation.

    Like with anything else the answer is not ban it all, the answer is to educate...we didnt not have all these rules and zero tolerance and look...we survived.

    It is a very fine line, but going to extremes in either direction does not solve the problem it just creates new ones.
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  6. #34
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    Quote Originally Posted by Stargazer View Post
    No its not acceptable and should be dealt with when it occurs. But what are we teaching children about this topic. It bad for someone to even hug you. So, and this has happened, a friend or relative hugs them as any would and they have been told that it is bad and now that person is charged with child molestation.

    Like with anything else the answer is not ban it all, the answer is to educate...we didnt not have all these rules and zero tolerance and look...we survived.

    It is a very fine line, but going to extremes in either direction does not solve the problem it just creates new ones.
    I have to disagree! As a mom with two boys in a town where this stuff has occurred in the schools I am glad there is a zero tolerance policy! It makes me as their mom feel more comfortable that more than likely these incidents will not occur and as of the inception of these rules there have been very few!

    They aren't banning anything that is necessary for our child's development in that school! Its my job as their mom to shower them with hugs and teach them the appropriate time and place for displays of affection at home and I disagree schools are the time and place for hugging!


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    there should be more parents like you Beauty, unfortunately that is not the case.

    " I'm on the frontline, don't worry I'll be fine, the story is just beginning. I say goodbye to my weakness, so long to the regret, and now I see the world through diamond eyes" Shinedown

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    Quote Originally Posted by nozzle jockey View Post
    there should be more parents like you Beauty, unfortunately that is not the case.
    Thanks, but Stargazers point of over sheltering of our children is a problem for sure and I appreciate his viewpoint! I just appreciate my child's safety way more!


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    Quote Originally Posted by Beauty View Post


    I have to disagree! As a mom with two boys in a town where this stuff has occurred in the schools I am glad there is a zero tolerance policy! It makes me as their mom feel more comfortable that more than likely these incidents will not occur and as of the inception of these rules there have been very few!

    They aren't banning anything that is necessary for our child's development in that school! Its my job as their mom to shower them with hugs and teach them the appropriate time and place for displays of affection at home and I disagree schools are the time and place for hugging!
    I raised 3 daughters and they hugged thier friends all the time. But I am not saying let it haappen, frankly it should be a case by case issue. As for bullied, well unfortunately if you are thier target they will find something, i know I was bullied a lot. It took me standing up and not the school or my parents to end it. Cause realistically for everyone 1 bully the school.may catch there are 20 more they miss.

    The best I can put this, we need to make sure are kids are prepared for the real world while keeping them safe. We cant be there and protect them 24/7. The biggest lesson I taught my kids was I cant stop you from doing anything cause i wont be there all the time, but remember whatever you choose to do, you had best be prepared to pay the consequences of that choice. I will not bail.you out.
    Ask me and I will tell, tell me so I don't have to ask

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  12. #38
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    Quote Originally Posted by Stargazer View Post
    I raised 3 daughters and they hugged thier friends all the time. But I am not saying let it haappen, frankly it should be a case by case issue. As for bullied, well unfortunately if you are thier target they will find something, i know I was bullied a lot. It took me standing up and not the school or my parents to end it. Cause realistically for everyone 1 bully the school.may catch there are 20 more they miss.

    The best I can put this, we need to make sure are kids are prepared for the real world while keeping them safe. We cant be there and protect them 24/7. The biggest lesson I taught my kids was I cant stop you from doing anything cause i wont be there all the time, but remember whatever you choose to do, you had best be prepared to pay the consequences of that choice. I will not bail.you out.
    I totally get that! You make excellent and valid points...we actually agree! I have three nieces in the schools here and they hug their friends all the time, but not at school! Nothing wrong with that and actually I think its good for their development, but I also think learning restraint and control over ones actions is a good lesson and yes school is tasked with teaching our kids those things! Studying and being prepared for class teaches discipline as well as restraint and rule following!

    But to have a kid labeled gay? (I feel like Seinfeld right now...Not that there's anything wrong with that!) Or get beaten
    because they showed affection to the "wrong" person! Ugh

    Point is its avoidable and yup we should put those rules in place to avoid it! Like I said...its hugging!!! They aren't banning the ability for the child to tell their friends how they feel about them! They are banning hugging and touching for 6-8 hrs of their day...its not the end of the world and if even one kid at the end of the year avoids a bad time then I will support it!


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